Getting divorced is a process with numerous steps and decisions. Once it is over, you will have to live with the choices you made for years to come—or even the rest of your life. This is why it is crucial to make smart decisions and avoid mistakes.
Unfortunately, many men either rush through the divorce process, failing to devote the necessary time and attention to decision-making. As a result, they end up giving up more than is necessary. Or, many men hold on too long to show that they were “right” and to get validation, thereby costing precious time and adding extraordinary stress to their lives.
As divorce lawyers, we know how emotionally stressful it is to end a marriage. In either scnerio you need to take the time on the front end to really understand the impact of your goals and objectives, so you can implement a plan that is strategic when it comes to issues of property division, alimony, and child custody, costly errors are highly likely.
To help make sure you get fair and advantageous outcomes during the divorce process, here are five mistakes you must avoid.
Mistake #1: Failing to Identify Your Separate Assets
When it comes to dividing assets in divorce, New Jersey follows the principle of equitable distribution. The factors the court considers in equitably dividing property are listed in N.J.S.A 2A:34-23.1. Only marital property is subject to division; separate assets are not although there are exceptions to some of the below so make sure you give all the facts to your attorney upfront before believing something is or isn’t exempt when it may be just the opposite.
As a general rule, separate assets fall into one of the following categories and are those which you . . .
- Owned prior to the date of marriage
- Acquired during the marriage by gift or inheritance
- Protected with a valid prenup or post-nup
- Acquired after the initiation of divorce proceedings (depending on the circumstances).
However, all assets are considered marital property in divorce until they are proven or shown to be categorized otherwise. To prevent your spouse from claiming a portion of your separate property, take the time to prepare a comprehensive list of the assets that you believe should not be on the table. Gather all documentation you have about each asset to help prove your ownership. While doing so may be time-consuming, especially if you are in a high-net-worth marriage, having records showing a property is yours alone will be critical should it be disputed.
Mistake #2: Failing to Accurately Value Your Marital Assets
How much is your home worth today? What about your car? Do you have collectibles that hold significant financial value? Are you a business owner? Do you have a retirement account? These are all examples of assets that must be accurately valued in order to “equitably” distribute your marital assets during the divorce process, whether you are negotiating a settlement between yourselves, or the court will divide your property.
Some assets, such as bank accounts, are more straightforward to value. Others, such as artwork, are more complicated and can require the help of expert appraisers.
There are different methods for valuing assets depending on the type of property. The valuation process can become complicated if you have many assets or complex properties. Your attorney will work with you to find the type and kind of appraiser you need to value the asset(s) in question and it is not as simple as using an appraisal you got for another reason and parlaying that and repurposing it for the divorce.
Mistake #3: Assuming Your Wife is Entitled to More than You Are
Divorce laws have caught up with the realities of modern society, and in today’s world your wife is not automatically entitled to more than you in your divorce. This is true with regard to all of the major aspects of your divorce—asset division, financial support, and child custody.
As a husband and a father, you are entitled to your fair share of financial resources and parenting time based on the specific facts of your case. So, it would be wise to into the process with the attitude that you have the same rights as your spouse and that you expect the unique factors of your marriage—and not your gender—to be used in making decisions. Should you encounter bias, which sometimes men still feel, look to your attorney to advocate for fairness on your behalf.
Mistake #4: Relying on Incomplete Information
Since you have only one chance to get things right (while it is true that you can seek to modify the terms of your divorce under certain circumstances, the grounds for seeking modification are limited and often more complicated), you need to make sure you are relying on complete information. One area where information is sometimes incomplete is when it comes to assets.
If you have any reason to suspect that your wife may be hiding assets, you should utilize the available legal means to ensure that you have full access to her records as well. Your lawyer can walk you through hiring a financial investigator or even a forensic expert to analyze the data obtained.
You must also take the time to locate all your relevant divorce records. One point to make here is that you should never make the mistake of trying to hide assets yourself. When you are found out, you could lose that asset to your spouse and face additional court financial penalties.
Mistake #5: Going Through Your Divorce Without a Cohesive Strategy
While property division, alimony, and children’s concerns may all seem like distinct issues, they are actually all interrelated. To ensure that you achieve a favorable overall outcome in divorce, you need to execute a cohesive strategy focused on securing the full package of rights you desire and to which you are entitled.
Unless you have a clear understanding of New Jersey divorce law, a lawyer will be instrumental in helping you develop and effectively execute such a strategy. You should not make the mistake of forgoing knowledgeable legal representation from an experienced divorce attorney when there is so much at stake.
Contact a New Jersey Men’s Rights Attorney for Guidance
Are you preparing to go through a divorce in New Jersey? We can help you avoid errors in divorce that negatively impact you financially and in relationships with your children.
For legal advice tailored to your personal circumstances, contact [MFR] Men’s & Fathers’ Rights Divorce Lawyers in Hackensack. Call (201) 880-9770 or inquire online today to arrange a confidential case evaluation.
Our family law attorneys have decades of experience helping clients to make wise decisions and avoid mistakes during the divorce process that can affect them for years to come.
