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There’s no denying how difficult it can end up being to be married to a narcissistic woman, and going through a New Jersey divorce with this type of individual can be even more difficult.
“Narcissistic personality” is defined as displaying any kind of lack of empathy towards others, as well as showing signs of being self-centered, arrogant, demanding, manipulative and having a blatant disregard for the truth. Women who are known to suffer from this personality disorder are 100% certain that they constantly are deserving of special treatment, from everyone.
Female Narcissists Exist
Female narcissists are very much like male narcissists in that they may come off as very charismatic and even charming while in public, but that all changes behind closed doors when any type of facts somehow conflict with her otherworldly perspective.
Although it’s relatively known that males make up the majority of society’s narcissists, there are simply certain stereotypes surrounding females that in a way downgrade or hide their narcissistic tendencies. When a woman displays haughty or selfish behavior many men may simply assume she’s a “diva” or “daddy’s girl”; and men are always much less likely to report any kind of physical or emotional abuse due to shame.
Female Narcissistic Traits
The following are some of the most common traits associated with female narcissists:
- They’re typically very sexually seductive and attractive.
- They tend to be wealthy, but don’t have lucrative careers or proportionate education.
- They tend to contact the police on a frequent basis after baiting their husbands into arguments, or without a reasonable cause.
- They may potentially have had multiple children from multiple husbands
- Many female narcissists idealize or “love-bomb” like male narcissists by seducing their targets extremely quickly.
- Similar to male narcissists, she may stonewall her husband, give the silent treatment, or withhold sex for no apparent reason.
- Female narcissists tend to utilize their children as tools for their manipulation, even when the husband does all the work around the house and does the majority of childcare.
- Like a male narcissist, she will potentially cheat (no moral conscience).
- She may be willing to commit financial crimes and is overly concerned with the financial security of her husband.
Female Narcissists Are All About Drama
Female narcissists tend to be consistently bored, and although they may say they hate drama they are constantly baiting their husbands into unsubstantiated fights within no-win scenarios.
Narcissists love seeing their partners fall apart, which is why they also love to cause harm. They lie all the time, and they’ll play psychological games with their partners in order to confuse them and appease their constant desire for excitement.
What ends up typically happening is that husbands simply get tired of engaging in their wives’ drama and choose to leave the marriage, but this is when a female narcissist will utilize divorce litigation and the legal system as her new source of entertainment.
Dealing with Narcissists During Divorce
Going through a divorce settlement with a narcissistic wife is sometimes a constant struggle, and this is because you’ll notice that once one issue is resolved the narcissist pulls up another issue right away to keep the drama rolling. Even if these issues aren’t major, she may try to turn it into a major issue that causes unnecessary concern and litigation time.
There are a few important considerations that a husband and/or father can do to help get through these types of difficult divorce scenarios to make the process a little bit easier, including the following:
Always keep your children’s best interests in mind
The Bergen County court will always be working with both parties to construct a settlement that works best for the interests of the family’s children. We’ll always be able to help you when it comes to emphasizing your necessity to bring stability to your children’s lives and to prioritize their needs first. If your children are old enough, they’ll potentially be able to help explain the differences between your wife’s public and private behavior so a New Jersey judge can better understand the situation you find yourself within.
Giving in to your wife’s demands won’t help
It’s, of course, necessary to compromise and let go of certain issues in order to come to a good settlement for both parties, but you can’t forget that narcissists truly believe that they are entitled to their own way without any reciprocity. She may honestly believe that it’s your responsibility to give in to her demands, which can always make divorce negotiation really difficult. It’s sometimes difficult to do so, but you must always remain calm while we support your position with valid evidence and counter her egotistical manipulations.
Let go of your emotions
It’s always a great strategy when you can let go of any feelings that are overwhelming you during a divorce settlement, especially with a narcissist. A narcissistic woman will undoubtedly put on a performance and try to come off as the “victim” of the failed marriage, and they’ll want to try to make you feel as though you’re a horrible person for initiating the divorce or failing them. It’s important to block these acts out and know that you truly are a good parent no matter what she says. We’ll help fight for what you need out of your New Jersey divorce, and keeping your emotions aside will only help you get there faster.
Hold onto the truth
Narcissistic women will be knowledgeable in how they can manipulate you, so you have to remain focused on the facts of your Bergen County divorce settlement. You can’t be drawn into the emotional dishonesty she displays. Holding firmly to the facts will always help you when it comes to achieving what you want the most out of a settlement, like child custody and visitation rights.
Collaborate with the Bergen County court to craft the decree’s language
We’ll work together to ensure that your divorce decree includes very specific and clear language so your ex doesn’t have any wiggle room to get around the letter of the order. There’s a good chance that they’ll try to do so, and we’ll be there to help you stop their persistent machinations and dramatics.
Reach Out to a New Jersey Men’s Rights Divorce Attorney in Confidence
If you’re concerned that you may be going through a divorce settlement with a woman that displays signs of narcissistic personality disorder, then you should contact us for an initial consultation or call us at 201-880-9770 so we can better understand your situation and help you devise your most effective, responsible divorce strategy.
Carrie S. Schultz, Esq. – author
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